Dad: Thank You for Choosing Me!

When we go through life changing experiences we start to realize the people who matter most. My dad has been on my mind a lot and I feel like I have taken his role as my father for granted. The reality is my dad chose me. Being adopted is hard no matter the situation and some people handle it differently than others. For me I struggled with this fact. I hated my story. I wanted my "REAL" dad in my life. I felt I needed that.

As I write I try to follow the spirit, I try to have an open mind and I do my best to be as real and raw as I possibly can.

As I mentioned above my dad has been on my mind a lot lately and I feel that this post needs to be for him! If there is anything that you can take away from this, it is DO NOT WAIT to talk about how you feel. Holding in emotions does not solve anything. Do not wait for life changing things to happen for you to express your feelings. Make time for the people who matter most in your life, and NEVER take anybody for granted.

Dad :

27 years ago you made a decision, probably one that you weren't really sure what you were getting yourself into. One that probably changed your life. One that I am grateful you did. I didn't realize just how much you mean to me until having to go through this experience. You chose to be my dad. You chose to give me your last name. You adopted me as if I was your own.

I have thought back on my life and there are so many things that you taught me. Like how to ride a bike, mow the lawn, throw a softball. You taught me how to bat and how to work hard. You taught me about the Gospel and the importance of it. You taught me the importance of family. You saw my firsts of most things and all of the things I accomplished, you were also there for all the times I disappointed you.

Growing up I made a mistake. (well I made a few) The biggest one I made was not telling you how I felt. I made the mistake of not telling you that I felt different. I made the mistake of not fully trusting you with the battles I was fighting inside. Instead of talking to you, I bottled up all my emotions and put a smile on my face and acted like there was nothing really bothering me.

I felt like you loved your "biological" kids more than me and so I looked for attention and love in ways that I shouldn't have. I had little to no self esteem, because I felt like I wasn't enough. I'm sorry that it took an experience like the one I went through to realize that you were the best dad you could be. I'm sorry that I never talked to you about how I felt.

One of the greatest things that has come out of this experience is that I realized you are my dad and nobody can ever take that place. I also learned that it is much better to forgive and love even when it might be hard. I learned that NOBODY is perfect and we all make mistakes.

I will try harder to be better at making our relationship what I want it to be. It's never to late to change, and there is always room for improvement. I look forward to the future with a new outlook and perspective.

Dad - I have never really thanked you, From the bottom of my heart, Thank you! Thank you for choosing me! I love you!

Love Always,

Chelsea